Alone on the Waterfront
by fandomliciousdefinition
Summary: After the war, Percy received a gift of a lighthouse from his father. Nico watches him there, alone, debating whether it would be best for Percy if he knew Nico's secret, or whether it should stay hidden.


Nico walked along the rocky beach, kicking pebbles with his sneakers and blinking sea salt out of his eyes. He no longer had to look where he was going to find his destination. It seemed that he had walked this path countless times.

A sweeping gleam of light caught at the corner of his eye as the lighthouse made its rounds. This was where Nico was headed, though he'd never actually set foot in the building. After the war with Gaea had ended, Poseidon had given Percy a place where he could go to be alone with the sea. The lighthouse belonged to him, and he was the sole operator in the evenings, guiding ships to shore. Nico didn't know if it had been there before it was given to Percy. Percy had followed the signs his father left for him until he'd found it, abandoned but still in working condition.

Before the break-up, Percy had taken Annabeth there almost every night. That was before Nico had started coming to this spot so often. Now, Percy was always alone, gazing out into the night. There were no window panes, so the wind blew his hair back from his face. And of course, the sea salt never bothered the son of Poseidon. Since the light of the house always pointed away from Percy, out into the ocean, his face was always hidden somewhat in shadow, so it was hard for Nico to tell what he might be feeling up there, where Annabeth had once stood by his side.

These thoughts were what always turned Nico back from knocking on the lighthouse door. He felt so selfish when he thought about what he would say to Percy. How could he confess his feelings now, when Percy was heartbroken? All it would do was make Percy feel worse, knowing that he was the object, not only the victim, of unrequited love. The dark things he had done to end the war may have saved more lives than they took, but there were some things Annabeth couldn't unsee. She said they would still be friends, but Percy had grown more and more distant over time. Nico couldn't blame him.

As Nico approached the base of the lighthouse, he could already feel his steps slowing, preparing to turn. He wanted to at least be able to tell Percy that he really, truly didn't hate him. And he knew Percy wouldn't believe him unless he knew the truth. But what would it matter to Percy now? There wouldn't seem to be much point in crossing off one item on a long list of things to feel guilty about.

Nico slowly turned around. He didn't blame Percy for what had happened. Gaea had driven them all to desperate measures at various times. In all honesty, a deep part of him really hated Annabeth for leaving Percy when he most needed someone to keep himself in check. It was impossible to be a hero when there was no right answer.

Nico hadn't realized that he'd strayed closer to the lighthouse than his usual. He was only a meter or two away, and the lighthouse wasn't that tall. When he took a step away, his foot crunched on the rocks. He froze, heart pounding, turning his gaze up to the top of the tower. Percy had moved over to the edge of the window frame, and was squinting down outside of his lighthouse. Nico wanted to shadow travel out of there, but some part of him wanted to stay, and he spent a long enough time fighting with himself for Percy to catch sight of him in the dark.

"Who's there?" Percy spoke in a travelling but soft tone, like he was trying to communicate but didn't want to wake anyone up. Nico bit his lip.

"I know you're there. Who are you and why are you here?"

Maybe it was because this was the thousandth time strolling along that stupid coastline, or because the sound of Percy's weak voice made him desperate to provide some sort of comfort, but Nico decided to throw caution to the wind. He would make it clear to Percy that whatever this was, it wasn't his fault. If he could make Percy feel even a fraction of a bit better, it was worth it. "Nico," he called, matching Percy's volume.

"Nico?" he sounded vaguely surprised. "What do you want?"

"Can I just… talk to you?"

"Come on up." Percy had turned his attention back to the light's reflection on the waves. Feeling nervous, Nico made his way numbly all the way to the base of the lighthouse, through the door, and up the spiralling staircase. His footsteps' ringing on the metal stairs sounded ear-splitting among the quiet of the night.

Nico stepped into the room of the lighthouse for the first time. Even though he was only there to talk to Percy, he couldn't help but take a glimpse of the vast, writhing ocean. It really was a breathtaking sight, even though Nico wasn't a huge fan of the ocean. After a moment, Percy turned to face Nico. His eyes were tired and red.

"So?" he said, in a forced light tone.

"I just…" Suddenly the thought of what he was about to stay felt overwhelming. But it was too late to turn back now. He promised himself he was going to say it. "I have some things to say to you."

"Go ahead."

"Do you… if you still think I hate you, I don't."

Percy didn't respond. His eyes had drifted back to the ocean. Nico was sure he didn't believe that. Well, he would in a second. This wasn't the kind of secret someone makes up.

"I'm serious. I had a different reason for… you know, avoiding you and… I don't know…"

Percy's eyes had turned back to Nico, his brow slightly furrowed. "What do you mean?"

From up here, Nico could see the sea-green of his eyes. His heart seemed to be clogging his throat. "Just that… I have a lot of feelings about you, and none of them is hate."

The words felt awkward in his mouth, and hung awkwardly in the air. Percy just blinked. "Huh?"

Typical Percy. Even after all that had happened, he still managed to be ridiculously tactless. Nico hadn't thought he was being subtle.

"I was in- I had a crush on you, okay? Like back, ever since I met you, even, I just, you might have been confused but thats why-"

"_On me?_" Percy looked downright flabbergasted. Nico's face was burning. But it was the least depressed he had looked in a while. For the moment he was too astonished to be upset. "But, _why_?" He seemed genuinely puzzled.

"What do you mean 'why'? Because of your good looks of course."

Percy just blinked at him. "Is that a joke?"

Nico tried to laugh through his embarrassment, but it came out as more of a choked splutter. "Look, you- you're a hero, okay? Everything you do is for someone else, and you just- you try and save everyone and it might not work out but that's not your fault okay?" All the aching thoughts that ran through Nico's head constantly, especially when he saw the pain in Percy's eyes, began to tumble out. "All you can see is what Annabeth said and she was wrong, everyone else knows she was wrong, even she does. She just knows she can't be your protector anymore. People still look to you for inspiration, you know, and you always look away, like you don't deserve it, and you pretend everything's okay when it's not, and you're just grating into yourself to keep others happy, and you don't deserve it, okay?" Nico spoke fast, his words tripping over each other, and by the end he was out of breath. Percy just stared at him, uncomprehending. Nico felt a horrible mix of embarrassment and sadness at that look in Percy's eyes. Why couldn't Percy let what happened be in the past?

Percy approached Nico and hesitantly put a hand on his shoulder. His eyes locked with Nico's and he looked like he was searching for the right words. "I don't… thank you. For telling me."

Nico just nodded, wanting to fasten his eyes to the ground but unable to look away from those deep eyes which held so much more than what was fair for an eightteen year old.

Taking him by surprise, Percy suddenly moved forward and enfolded Nico in a tight hug. It wasn't like he was trying to comfort Nico, though. His face was buried into Nico's shoulder and Nico let his arms wrap hesitantly around Percy's waste. Percy wasn't crying, but Nico could tell the tears were just below the surface. Percy just held him tightly, like he'd desperately needed someone to hold on to, and Nico hugged him back, just trying not to be too aware of the proximity.

Percy finally pulled away slightly, and said in a shaky voice, "How did you know it wasn't okay?"

"I know what not okay looks like." Percy hadn't taken his arms off of Nico's shoulders. He didn't seem to want to let Nico go. It made Nico feel warmth spread through his chest that he was unaccustomed to.

He didn't notice Percy leaning closer until their noses were almost touching. It felt almost unreal; Nico felt each of Percy's exhales brush his own lips.

The kiss was short, but soft and deep. Nothing else happened. There was no change in the wind. The only sounds were their breathing and the crashing of the waves, and the lighthouse still swung its light over the sea, back and forth.

So they watched it together. A sense of relief flooded over Nico, like he had finally come to a rest where he was meant to be. And Percy no longer watched the waves alone.


End file.
